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The 90s were incredible. Britney Spears debuted her first album, The Spice Girls were formed and a Sabrina the Teenage Witch was everything. You know who doesn’t get enough credit? The Noughties. The Pussycat Dolls had us loosening up the buttons on our denim mini-skirts whilst listening to their songs, downloaded using Limewire, on our Motorola flip phones. Beyoncé went solo, Island girl Rihanna migrated to America and Britney …. well we all know what Britney did. Given a toss-up between spending an eternity in either decade, I honestly don’t know which one I’d choose. Who am I kidding? The Simple life gave me life and Paris Hilton released a single in the noughties. I know exactly which one I’d choose. I cannot wait to order a cheap, synesthetic blonde wig, oversized sunglasses and a fake Louis V for my Paris Costume for the 00s party I’m attending this February.

Here’s a playlist of Divas to enjoy at your very own Noughtie’s inspired slumber party, get the Bacardi Breezers in girls, because you’re worth it.

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  1. Oops!…I Did It Again – Britney Spears

 

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The hardest decision of my life was choosing between this & Lucky as the opening act.

Nostalgia Power: 10/10

  1. Don’t Let Me Get Me – P!nk

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P!nk taught all 90s babies the meaning of teenage angst before they even knew what hormones were. She gave us the perfect outlet for raging at our mum for not getting us the LG chocolate for Christmas.

Nostalgia Power: 6.5/10

 

  1. Love Don’t Cost A Thing – Jennifer Lopez

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Jenny from the Block was representing big booties before Kimmy K was even organising Paris’ wardrobe.

Nostalgia Power: 4/10

 

  1. Dirrty – Christina Aguilera

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If your parents caught you dancing to Christina with your Ethel Austin’s knickers pulled up above your ripped jeans then you weren’t allowed to play out for like a week.

Nostalgia Power: 9/10

 

  1. All The Things She Said – t.A.T.u

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“Mum, what’s a lesbian?”

My favourite song of all time.

Fond memories of my friend CWR texting the DJ at the silent disco in Leeds, “t.A.T.u please.”  “t.A.T.u and I’ll show my tits.” “ t.A.T.u or I’ll bomb.” “ WHY YOU NO LIKE RUSSIAN LESBIANS.”

Also screaming at a girl friend in the toilet at a party that she didn’t have time to wipe because I could hear the intro coming from the DJ booth.

Nostalgia Power: 10/10 (If you disagree, you’re lying)

 

  1. Sk8er Boi – Avril Lavgine

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Most Noughties song title of all time.

Nostalgia Power: 7.5

 

  1. Wake Up – Hilary Duff

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I’m with her.

Nostalgia Power: 7

 

  1. Sound Of The Underground – Girls Aloud

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No wet-play at Primary School was complete without a Girls Aloud dance routine for the Dinner ladies.

Nostalgia Power: 6/10

 

  1. Superstar – Jamelia

 

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Anthem of every school disco.

Nostalgia Power: 10

 

  1. Baby Boy – Beyoncé

 

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Dutty Wining since ’03.

Nostalgia Power: 7.5

  1. Milkshake – Kelis

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Grab a McDonalds Banana shake and shake those hips.

Nostalgia Power: 10/10

  1. (There’s Gotta Be) More To Life – Stacie Orrico

 

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If you don’t remember this one don’t ever return to this site again.

Nostalgia Power: 6.5

 

  1. Pieces Of Me – Ashlee Simpson

 

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Perfect for sitting next to the landline all day, every day.

Nostalgia Power: 7

 

  1. These Words – Natasha Bedingfield

 

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Every day I pray for the words ‘Natasha Bedingfield is making a comeback”.

Nostalgia Power: 10

 

  1. You Had Me – Joss Stone

 

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Back in the days when Joss’ man was her biggest concern, not whether her head was going to remain firmly on her shoulders or not.

Nostalgia Power: 5

 

  1. Dip It Low – Christina Milian

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Christina Milian, the most underappreciated Diva of all time. She is the Mulan of the music industry. If this playlist was in order of Banger Power rather than chronological, Dip It Low would be #1.

Nostalgia Power: 10

 

  1. Leave (Get Out) – JoJo

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JoJo, Feminist OG.

Nostalgia Power: 10

 

  1. What You Waiting For? – Gwen Stefani

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“Mum, what’s a stupid ho?”

Nostalgia Power: 7

 

  1. Push The Button – Sugababes

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Getting in a lift/elevator was never the same again.

Nostalgia Power: 9

 

  1. Buttons – The Pussycat Dolls (not feat. Nicole Scherzinger at this point, officialy)

 

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Inventors of the slut drop.

Nostalgia Power: 10

 

  1. Since U Been Gone – Kelly Clarkson

 

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Kelly Clarkson was very nearly the first concert I ever went to, only I couldn’t find a companion. Shocking.

Nostalgia Power: 7

  1. 4ever – The Veronicas

 

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Listening to this on The Waltzers was my dream thanks to She’s The Man. Still dreaming.

Nostalgia Power: 6

 

  1. 1 Thing – Amerie

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Still trying to master that Turkey Gargle.

Nostalgia Power: 9

  1. Me & U – Cassie

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Cassie come back! This would be #2 in Banger Power order. Timeless.

Nostalgia Power: 10

 

  1. We Belong Together – Mariah Carey

 

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Wentworth Miller’s appearance in the music video had my new found hormones all over the place.

Nostalgia Power: 7

 

  1. Glamorous – Fergie

 

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The perfect word to describe how you felt with your quiff up, hoops in, listening to your iPod Nano on the bus.

Nostalgia Power: 9

 

  1. Promiscuous – Nelly Furtado

 

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#3 Banger Power.

Nostalgia Power: 10

 

  1. Hips Don’t Lie – Shakira

 

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Released around the time I was obsessed with tampon humour and took ‘I’m on tonight, my hip’s don’t lie’ a literal too literal.

Nostalgia Power: 10

  1. Come Back To Me – Vanessa Hudgens

 

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Maybe if Baby V hadn’t tarnished her squeaky-clean Disney image, I really think she could have outshone Miley.

Nostalgia Power: 4

  1. Confessions Of A Broken Heart (Daughter To Father) – Lindsay Lohan

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Lindsay got deep with her daddy issues and expressed her pain through her music, rather than cocaine consumption on credit. That was the latter part of the noughties.

Nostalgia Power: 5

 

  1. Stars Are Blind – Paris Hilton

 

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When Paris wasn’t at work selling Salty Anal Weiner Burgers on the Simple Life, she was dropping bangers like this.  This would have gone to #1 if it wasn’t Paris. People need to leave rich, white women alone.

Nostalgia Power: 9

 

  1. Headstrong – Ashley Tisdale

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Ashley Tisdale walking the red carpet in a dress and jeans combo has still got me feeling something to this day. Get you a girl who can do both OG.

Nostalgia Power: 6

  1. Potential Breakup Song – Aly &AJ

 

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Aly and AJ inspired us all to send that ‘You’re jibbed’ text. Which one is Aly? Which one is AJ? Who cares? I didn’t know then and I don’t know now. But there’s no denying that this is an absolute tune.

Nostalgia Power: 8.5

  1. What Hurts The Most – Cascada

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Choosing a Cascada song was like Sophie’s Choice but this one hits you right in the feels.

Nostalgia Power: 5

  1. Umbrella – Rihanna

 

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Umbrella was #1 for about 2/3s of 2007.

Nostalgia Power: 10

  1. I Kissed A Girl – Katy Perry

 

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Sales of cherry chap sticks rocketed.

Nostalgia Power: 8.5

  1. Just Dance – Lady Gaga

 

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YASSSSSSS GAGA. YOU LOOK SO YOUNG.

Nostalgia Power: 9

  1. In For The Kill – La Roux

 

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I really appreciated La Roux’s first album. I did not appreciate people teling me I looked like her.

Nostalgia Power: 7

 

  1. Party In The USA – Miley Cyrus

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Back when Miley was still Hannah Montana and posing topless beneath a sheet was her biggest controversy. Oh and some pretty racist Myspace pics.

Nostalgia Power: 8

  1. Tik Tok – Ke$ha

 

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Fun Fact: Before Ke$ha, I actually didn’t know who Mick Jagger was.

2016 has been awful for Ke$ha, I hope 2017 treats her good.

Nostalgia Power: 10

 Always remember, Pop music saves lives & Bill Clinton did not have sexual relations with that woman.

XOXO

Smashton Fierce

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